london new years fireworks

I can’t explain why, but everyone that was out in London last night on New Year’s Eve are referred to as revelers, as in Revelers Bring In the New Year in the Cold.

London crowds new years

As for me, it was tempting to stand in the 0 degree weather with 50,000 other revelers and revel while not being able to actually see the fireworks. It was doubly tempting because the prime areas near the river are closed off after the first busload of fatso Americans revelers arrive. In the end, I decided I would rather stick a stingray barb through my manhood than do that.

What we did instead was actually quite a change from what we did last year, which was survive an orgy of freeflying fireworks in a sea of people in Helsinki. We went to a dinner party celebrated in North London. While we did not get to revel with the revelers, it made for a lovely time with lovely people and lovely Russian Standard vodka.

Happy New Year from the London Reveler

12thDecember

The Proper Pint

Pint

Question: “Want to grab a pint after work?”
Answer: “Is the pope Catholic?”

So it’s answering a question with a question but hey, that answer is never misunderstood. And this, folks, is my typical work day. Alternatively, you could answer that rhetorical question with: “Is Obama African American?”

What is of note is that there is a difference between the American pint and the British pint. The difference is 4 ounces. The proper British Imperial pint is indeed 20oz instead of 16oz. in America. This means two pints adds up to 40 ounces. Yes, as in “foety of OE, son“. What this also means is that people order the 10oz half pint. Yes, half a beer. They do it here. It is perfectly acceptable to order half pints if you don’t want to be downing another 20 ounces.

Now, this does have certain implications. It means if you are drinking with someone and they’re ordering the Skinny Bitch while you’re downing pint after pint, you should probably slow things down as you will not be able to go drink for drink with that someone. And by slow things down, I mean kick this person’s arse for ordering a Skinny Bitch…ninja style.

The cock

The Cock on the Sam Smith pub crawl route and is certainly one of the best pubs in London. Yes, there are grander, classier, nicer pubs out there but you cannot beat the name. They also make great cocktails. See what I did there?

The cock sign
Please do not Cock Block the pavement.

Spread Eagle

Ok, I will admit I have not actually been to this pub but I have walked by it plenty of times and…um it’s name is Spread Eagle. Next week I am going to visit The Spoon and The Dirty Sanchez. I’m sure they exist in London.

2ndNovember

I voted!

ballot

I just FAX’ed in my absentee ballot a couple of minutes ago. You can see who I voted for in the image above. I have to say it was an exciting election and I hope my candidate wins tomorrow!!!!

Good luck!!!

snow in london

So last night, London got the first snow of the season. As a matter of fact, it was the first time it has snowed in October in 74 years. Last year, we didn’t get it until like April or so. It was so unexpected that someone even died:

Just two days after the end of British Summertime, the first snowfall of the year saw a lorry driver killed when his vehicle collided with another lorry on the M40 in Buckinghamshire.

It’s almost like when it rains in California and you get massive car accidents because people forget how to drive in the rain and also because the grease on the road makes it quite slippy. Regardless, it’s pretty amazing to get snow before all of the leaves have fallen. Probably something to do with global warming and that Hummer that you drive to work to work every day and all those ESPN printouts you bring into the loo to read as you go #2. Shame on you.

nfl

It’s about halfway through the season, but if you want to watch NFL in the UK, there are some options I outlined previously. There’s also a purely online way of watching NFL, the NFL Game Pass by Yahoo. This is only available outside of the US and looks like a nice deal for those that don’t have a cable box to plug a Slingbox into in the US or can’t be bothered.

saints chargers

I didn’t really watch last year’s game between the Giants and the Dolphins. Mainly because those teams sucked and the weather was bollocks. I did, however, watch the Chargers-Saints game from home on the BBC. It was actually a good game, except for the fact that my home team Chargers lost and played like arse. It was also very cool that I got to watch it on my tele instead of over Slingbox like I normally do.

Here are two main differences on watching the NFL in the UK vs what is shown on my Slingbox:

1. There are no James Brown newsbreaks. As in…every time something happens in the league, like a TD, American channels cut to it to see the 77 yard Touchdown that was just thrown. Well, they announce it, and then we just watch the players huddling. WTF.

2. There are no commercials. Before you start thinking this is great, I think it’s almost worst than having commercials. Basically, every time the commentators say, “We’ll be back after these messages”, the BBC cuts over to Jerry Rice, some Brit, and some other American dude. Jerry Rice was a great wide receiver. Let me repeat…Jerry Rice was a great wide receiver. That’s all I have to say about that. I would have preferred Bud commercials.

3. It’s clear nobody knows WTF is going on…including the BBC host, who you have to listen to every 10 minutes because there are no commercials. I think it’s because there’s no tea break like in cricket.